“There is a certain sanctity that comes with having a space that is yours and yours alone. Whether that place is a physical location on a map or a mental or virtual destination, everyone needs somewhere to take solace from life’s harsh realities.” ~Me
This is about to go 0 to a hundred REAL QUICK!
My issue is that more and more with the use of technology in our everyday lives, getting these moments of quietude has become a necessary luxury: we need to it, but can’t always “afford” it. With every break through in this technology age meant to allow connectivity, people are constantly allowed to invade and desecrate even the most sacred areas of our lives.
In a world where we are constantly being ripped at the seams trying to divide our time, attention and energy among everything from work, to school, to relationships, to friends, to church/religion/spirituality, to everything in between (like those cat videos on YouTube), some would say that’s where technology, the internet and social media come in; they argue that it’s the internet/social media that allow you to find that balance between all of them. That may be a decent point when you consider how many of us have allowed our devices to be our “iron lungs”. They seem to keep our whole lives functioning balanced and perfectly aligned allowing us to communicate with friends and relatives worlds away with the simple swipe of a screen, make complex business decisions and deals with just one tap and scroll for hours being entertained by everyone and everything. We get our news and current affairs from relying on our email’s homepage or whichever hashtag is trending on Twitter. Heck! We need Facebook and the calendar app that’s synced to our various contact lists to remind us of the birthdays of the closest people in our lives. And God forbid we ever have to dial a phone number from memory instead of scrolling through our call log! Do you see where I’m going with this?
With all of that said and done, I’d firmly like to say that I disagree. Now before you jump down my throat, let me clear to you, I don’t claim to be a motherlovin’ saint! The truth is that I’m right there with the rest of you. I can’t ensure that I wake up by a certain time without my phone alarm (or my mom, cuz let’s be real, the snooze button is so easy to hit), the only persons’ number I know well enough to dial without assistance is my family’s, and more often than not Facebook is the one that alerts of the plights of our world, right from the comfort of my bed, or in this case, the living room couch! Even irony is wasted on the fact that I’m writing this post on a laptop with an internet connection to upload to a blogging platform where it’ll be read (or not) by someone somewhere. I’m a sap for comfort and convenience too. But regarding this topic, at this point in time, I disagree with the masses because I really do believe what I’m saying.
Being as hooked up as I am to the internet (not so much social media), so many of my “friendships” and associations are hosted through these means. Whatsapp is used so much for “friends” because I have no time to take a breath, much less to see anyone, and say “hey, let’s go eat some yogurt!” without KNOWING that my life will fall apart the instant I do anything that isn’t related to the workload I have looming over my life. This is because, even though I have whatsapp, I don’t necessarily use it. I’m that person you texted that one day in 2011 telling me that Drake dropped his album “Take Care”, and I would’ve just opened that message today and taken another 3 months to respond! (Quick sidenote, Drake’s newest album “Views”, anyone listen to it yet? Is it as good as people are claiming? I’m skeptical! LOL!)
I’m not proud of this but I do this for the same reason I’m trying to get across through this post: SOMETIMES I JUST NEED SPACE. There’s nothing wrong! I could just be busy with a lot of tasks on my plate needing attention versus you wanting to talk about Jon Snow’s comeback (too late to say spoiler alert?) or just tired and need to recharge; and truth is, I’m not really in the mood to open your message and explain which case that may be because that just opens a whole other can of worms with you. Or, something could be wrong, but that doesn’t mean I want to talk about it. So I prefer to just leave your message unanswered until there’s head space to answer it.
The most interesting part about this is that I always clearly see just who gets it and “me” when this happens. Here’s why. With all the communication that these things like technology and social media allow for, some people have seemingly developed this sense of entitlement to your time, and attention and whole life! Like they take it as a personal insult that I didn’t respond to their text immediately, or didn’t try to contact them about what’s going on with me, or didn’t bother to upload a picture revealing something personal or post a status update saying I don’t want to be disturbed so they could disturb me to ask me why I don’t want to be disturbed. You see where I’m going with this? Cuz for the love of God, some people don’t seem to get it!
Here’s an example…follow me on this: Person A will text once and get no reply. They’ll text again with the same result. Then, one of two things always happen:
- They’ll try another means of contacting me. If they’re unsuccessful, they’ll get the point, and chill until I reach out to them. If they are successful, which is usually the case, I’ll tell them what’s up and we both go on our merry way. If they only have one means of contacting me, that’s already a major red-flag; please refer to #2.
- Keeps trying what is usually the only means they have, still with futile efforts.
So, I trust you’re a sensible enough person to know who the “real friend” is, which brings me to another point. Fun fact, “real friends” know themselves and know which category they fall into; the other friends think they’re one thing when they’re probably not; and sue me for not wanting to be the bearer of bad news and decipher between the two! It’s gotten so bad that when my wifi gives trouble, I almost rejoice that I have a legitimate excuse to not answer messages. The only thing I don’t like is that no wifi also impedes on my ability to read wattpad books and watch DIY videos on YouTube, and that’s just unacceptable.
So you know how I solve that problem? Simple. Every couple months, my phone starts giving me hell, for whatever reason. And you know what my first solution always is, even when it’s not necessary? You guessed it! I DELETE ALL MY SOCIAL MEDIA APPS! And I don’t bother to check the sites, so I just kinda live like a metaphorical caveman for a few months and it’s literally the most refreshing ever. I feel like I can ALMOST breathe again, and it allows me to tap into areas of my mind or friends and family I’d been disconnected from for while. As always, there are still people who wont get it, and will say that’s a bit extreme, but I’d have to care to feel some sort of way about that, which I don’t.
You see, this semester has been hell! I was going to say that it’s been like hell, but I came to the conclusion that a direct comparison would work better in this case than a simile or metaphor, because I really do feel that this semester has just been that bad. It’s been so forceful with its shit-heaping on me, it reminds of Trump’s efforts to basically f*ck the lives of minorities/immigrants! Much like Trump’s, if this semester had a slogan, it would be “Make Rynzi lose her shit again”! Also, much like Trump once again, it seems to be very close to winning. I’ve been through 3 months of teaching practice (including, but not limted to 12 weeks worth of lesson plans, notes, presentations, charts, exams/ classworks/homeworks and the according grades, invigilation, class control, diplomacy, hypocrisy, fake smiles, civil behaviour and a MASSIVE portfolio), a programming course (inclusive of 2 lecture tests, a lab test, a major project meant for a group but done solo and a final exam) and now a major research project! Yup, that’s right, you heard me! At this point in the year, the semester is basically over for many University students, or at least the rest who attend my University. But, oh no, not for me! No! I still have 2 assignments to do, that are basically going to rip me to shreds! And to prove my point, all I’ll say about one of them is 2 words: GROUP PROJECT! Boom! *mic drop*. DISCLAIMER, group work can be great sometimes, (that’s what she said?) IF everyone is pulling their weight! But at this point, I’m so tired, I’m probably going to be the bad link in my group.
So with all of that said, I’M TAKING A BREAK, even if it’s just for ONE DAY. I’m gonna go watch a reality, write a poem, read a paperback, maybe call up a friend and go eat some ice cream, and not post about it anywhere, and worry about the consequences later. Because I’m gonna drop dead before I let this damn world cause my mind to unravel!
I challenge anyone who reads this to try it for a while. For a few days or weeks, just unplug…
*ends rant…dials Pizza Hut getting the number from the REAL Yellow Pages (That’s right! Phone directories still do exist)…asks mom if she wants to watch “House Hunters” with me*
xoxo, from where my 7 dreams grow,